Looking back, I chuckle. I always dreamt of having children. There was never any doubt in my mind that if God allowed us children, being a mom would be my full time job and this was my heart's desire. Then, we had Maleah. She was perfect and we fell in love. But, it was hard. I cried for days after she was born. It was an ugly time, and something I couldn't pinpoint my feelings on. I loved my baby, but for this I wasn't prepared. Then, she became a toddler who gave her cousin scars because of her fierce personality. And, I cried for days. It was hard and I wasn't prepared. Now, I cry because I am so proud. It is still really hard, but seven years later I am able to look back and thank God for the guidance, and Maleah for the grace, in figuring out how to be a mom.
I'm so proud, because when I pick up Maleah from church, library, or school, I am told what a gem she is. I'm proud because she lets everybody else go first, gives all her candy and money away, and loves to hosts guests. I am proud because she is a hard worker. But, I am most proud because while she excels in school and is so generous, she doesn't talk about it or frankly even care. It's just a part of who she is.
Is my girl perfect? Oh goodness, no. There are plenty of things her little seven year old self is working on. But, she is becoming quite the fine little lady.
At seven years old, she is starting to love volleyball, biking, and rollerblading. She got an American Girl doll this year, and that was quite a rite of passage. She is becoming more independent and introverted, but still enjoys to be with her people. She is more serious, but loves a good time. She is very tall and very strong.
Being a mom is different than I thought it would be. It's better. While every year I feel a little grief come over me as they are one more year closer to leaving the nest, more than ever I am loving this season. My seven year old and I have great conversations, are able to do things together, and seeing her become who she is replaces the sadness with an overwhelming amount of joy.
I am so incredibly grateful God gave us Maleah Faith and has navigated seven years as we figure out how to parent this precious child. Though hard, unknown territories are always ahead with the first born, what a joy it has been. I say year seven is the sweetest yet!
Happy birthday, my girl!